Do you fear that you might be a gay? Do you fear that you might be attracted to a person of same sex? Do you fear that you might be sending signals of being homosexual? Do you doubt your sexuality? So we are here to help you find out which mental illness you have!!

What is OCD? 

OCD is an abbreviation for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, this is a mental illness… It is a mental illness in which a good or evil thought or a reminder comes to our mind repetitively and creates stress, anxiety, and an excessive amount of moral emotions like, guilt, shame, fear, etc.

There are many examples of it like thinking repetitively if you have closed the door or not if you have changed your ATM pin, what if your dad picks up your girlfriend’s call. Deep inside, you know that this can’t happen, but you can’t stop yourself from being afraid or guilty of these things. It is called obsession.

Then you take action to console yourself, you check the door, you take your phone, you ask your wife about the gas. It is called Compulsion. It gives you small satisfaction but the moral emotion or anxiety returns after some time. Combining both terms, we get the name of the illness, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, or OCD.

Homosexual OCD

Sexual Orientation OCD is called Homosexual OCD. Homosexual OCD contains not having believe in his own sexuality. In this subtype of OCD, the person has a doubt that they are attracted to the person of the same-sex. They find the person of same-sex attractive. When they see a person of the same-sex, they say ‘This person is attractive.’ After that, they have an obsessional thought that normal people don’t find the person of same-sex attractive. So they start questioning their sexuality. They start thinking that they might be homosexual even deep inside, they know that they are not. So they will need an endless confirmation that they are not homosexual. This thought comes again and again in their mind and creates anxiety. 

This is a simple process in which the person gets thought about him that they are attracted towards the person of same-sex. That leads him to think that they are not straight and they are homosexual. After that, they think that they should not be thinking about this. Here starts a struggle of thoughts that takes the person into anxiety and depression. 

Obsessions of SO-OCD:

Obsessions of SO-OCD are related to doubting one’s own sexuality. 

The first obsession we talk about is the fear of being homosexual. They have a thought that they might be homosexual, even deep in their heart they know that they are not, but the thought comes into their mind again and again and create anxiety. Even in daily life, they think that they love someone of the same sex and this makes them depressed and anxious. 

The second obsession of this OCD is fear of being rejected by society. They think that if the society finds that they have thoughts of being attracted towards a person of the same gender then the society will abandon them. If his wife finds out that he finds a man attractive then she would divorce him. 

The third obsession of this OCD is the fear of sending out signs of homosexuality. They think that they will send out the signs of homosexuality when they get the thought of being attracted to a person of the same gender. By this, they have to face shame and guilt. But they start feeling this shame and guilt so early that makes them depressed. 

Compulsions:

Dating for the contradiction is the common compulsion of this type of OCD. A person with this OCD starts dating a person of the opposite gender because he thinks that by this, he can define his sexuality. Sometimes, they think that they have an extreme need for a date and they start trying on every person of the opposite gender. They can spend a lot of time together but when they look back they find that there is nothing to define their relationship.

When they have a serious offense about this, they start to avoid going to public places, because they have a fear that they might find someone attractive to him and this would ruin their day. They prefer being at home. They also stop watching TV, reading papers, and other things that involve people. So because of this self-applied quarantine, they become like a monk.

They stand in front of the mirror to check their sexuality, they confirm that they don’t look like a homosexual person. They start doing activities that take them to be more of one gender, by this, they try to find their sexuality. 

They take a lot of photos of an attractive person of the same-sex and make sure that they don’t have feelings for them. On the flip side, they also take a lot of photos of the opposite gender person and try to find them attractive. They repeat this process a lot of times per day.

Continued